HERE'S WHAT YOU SAID

Just today we were cut-off by a beige boxy creature, coasting across four lanes of traffic, right to left, (and of course the RIGHT turn signal was blinking for the remaining miles of the journey). And, the driver was chatting gleefully on a cell phone!!! A dangerous combination...

I live in a dense residential area with lots of new families and therefore, lots of new mini vans. I also work at a local professional center that includes offices for a dentist, a doctor, and of course pediatrician, so there are a whole lot of minions in the parking lot. anyway, I just got off work one day, and was on my way through the parking lot to my car, i was just ready to put my key in the door, when out of nowhere, this woman in a dodge caravan comes screaming around the corner, she's looking in the back seat, fussing with her baby, with no clue as to where she was going. she ended up plowing into the side of my car. I drive a 1990 chevy blazer, which is built like a tank, but she managed to demolish the whole left side and when she got out started yelling at me for parking my car where I did (I guess I'm not supposed to park in parking spaces). she ended up having to pay for the repairs on my truck, but I still have higher insurance rates now.

Well, every time I get behind one of those mini vans I can't see in front of me. Those mini vans also always put their brakes on for no reason. I hate those darn things... A lot of people I work with have them. And when they need a new car, they go out and buy another one. Maybe they secretly want to be Sped van drivers or bus drivers! I saw one of my co-workers looking through the paper for a new vehicle. I said "oh what kind of new car are you planning on buying" he told me that he didn't want a car, he wanted a mini van !!! I gasped! I said "what do you want one of those things for?" He said because they were really cool!!

i cant believe people are judging a class of vehicles on the drivers who drive them we all have our own faults at driving none of us are perfect but get real those stories you are telling the people would have problems driving if they were driving a corvette or your average everyday car. I have 3 kids now and am faced with the problem of not enough space in my monte carlo i hate the looks of those mini vans but just might have to get one do to seating and pricing and gas mileage. Its tough enough to have kids and go from a beautiful convertible to a monte carlo now to the dreaded mommy mobile without these kind of web sites

No offense, but please don't cut mini vans down. The people who drive them are not always women, older people, and people who have children. I'm 18 and in a wheelchair, so I have to drive a mini van.

Hi. I was making my "I hate Mini vans Page" when I decided to do a search on the subject. I found your page. I LOVE IT! I have a few stories of my own.... here is why I hate mini vans: I hate mini vans because every time you drive behind them, they suddenly slow down. That's when you fuck with them. You can tail them, pull in front of them then slow down until they try to pass you, then you speed up. If they beep their horn, flick them off and speed down a side street.

no subject                                                                                                                         Sun, 7 Feb 1999

I can't wait to get a mini van, I have only 2 kids but that is enough to need a mini van and with the way the mobile car seats are made today, I really could use built in seats. So don't knock a mini van until you have tried one.
And I agree not all Mini van drivers are bad ones I've seen a lot of Mitsubishi eclipse who also keep there blinker on, hit there breaks every two blocks, and pull out in front of you like they own the road. so don't assume its only MINI VANS. get real.

he he I'm glad to finally find a group of people who share my opinions on the mini vans.
So as far as I'm concerned, all I got to say is lets round 'em up and burn them to the ground.

Mini-van haters, stand and be proud!                                                                        Wed, 10 Feb 1999
 

I can't believe that people are using kids as an excuse to drive one of those horrid sloth mobiles. It's bad enough that they're having kids. I am a staunch non breeder for more reasons than mini vans. It's those kind of people who breed more mini van culture. What's going to happen
to those kids? They're going to grow up thinking that it's okay to own an mini van,
stink up the land with their filth and irritate the non breeders.
We have to put a stop to it. I say castrate all the mini van drivers. It may seem a radical decision, but it's going to be well worth it. The world will be a better place for all of us.

You people are Stupid for thinking mini-vans are Dangerous or ugly
(and for the kid that got the Z24 my 1989 Chevy Astro could out-run that little 4-Banger any day of the week). My Chevy Astro had 390,000 on it before the motor finally gave out and even then the only thing that happened to it is the main oil bearing spun and my oil presure
shot up and screwed up the motor. As it sits right now it has a 4.3 liter V6 in it with tilt, cruise, and power everything and it still get 20 miles to the gallon (freeway) and 18 miles to the gallon (other).  So to you people who don't like mini-vans for whatever reason

Thanks for the good laugh, I needed that. My wife just totaled my mini van and tomorrow I am going to buy another.  Some fool ran a red light and plowed into my wife , see was bruised but ok. If see was driving a VW like you own she would be dead right now....

      How funny it is to see that there are "real" men and women out there
who feel the same as I do about the dreaded mini vans and their drivers.
You ever notice that when the man is driving the "family" around town, he looks
rather miserable. Maybe the boss sitting next to him decided for him, that a minion would be a cool and practical thing to have.
Maybe if these people would just glance at their instrument panel, they would notice that they have been driving around with the light on that says "service engine soon".   Get the hint...... It's time to take it off the road and keep it there.

Mini vans are bad, bad, bad, bad. They are not good. Not good, not good, not good. They are
 driven by fat people. Fat, fat, fat, people. Now moped. There's a quality vehicle. Everyone should
 own at least 1. Many people, such as my self ,own 5 or 6. Oh and you can't forget the trust worthy chevette. Now that is one amazing car. You can get them in a variety of colors. such as brown or white. Sometimes even a dark orange. They come with great trailer hitches, and they are super for off-roading. So make sure you get a moped if you don't already have one and Chevettes are  great gifts too!!!

I do understand the boy with 5 mopeds, has to have that many just to besure something starts and gets him down to the mall... I would like to see him and his chevette mate the trip from Dallas, TX to Juno, Alaska with a wife and i child...or where do you stick a wheelchair and luggage. By the way more fat-boys drive things they can hardly get into.

I guess that if spending time with your family isn't high on your list then you don't need a van. But for those of us who actually take meaningful time out for our families it's the only way to go.
It's fast enough for me to not miss my Mustang 5.0 GT. It has room enough for my wife to haul her business stuff from craft show to craft show.
It is safe and roomy enough to go on a 7000 mile road trip in November from Alaska to the lower 48. It is good for the environment- the only thing that gets close to it in pounds hauled/mpg is my one ton pickup(diesel).
And last but not least is the fact that the dogs get to go with us- what's more American than that?

Come now - a site against mini-vans!  That's like being against apple pie and motherhood.
I fail to see a stereotypical mini-van driver - no type of vehicle corners the market on bad drivers - unless of course, it is the drivers of a Corvette, a red cars, a car with air scoops and air
foils, a red-neck pickup trucks, etc.  I will admit that yuppies in the suburbs do like their mini-vans just like the previous generation like their station wagons.

I am 23 years old and by no means feel proud in saying that yes, I too own a mini van.  Unfortunately it was more of a logical choice than an effort to get the babes.
I drove across country from Massachusetts to California and needed something to sleep in.  Being in my position, though, does provide an interesting opportunity to smash mini van stereotypes in American society.  I like to blow by people doing 90 in the right lane, spew obscenities, and occasionally throw beer cans out the window.
This is all of course for show and I wouldn't do it if it weren't for my love of people.  I love people.  Someday I hope to drive my mini van off of a cliff and watch it explode in a cactus strewn ravine...but this is all far off in the distant future.  For now, I'll have to get by looking like a soccer mom.

Dear Jerk Off,

            I happen to own a Chevy Astro van, I am a junior in high school and I by far have the kickest ass car at my school. You say that old people drive vans and stupid people drive vans, and slow drivers drive vans. Well I bet you anything my Astro could beat your crappy car in a race. And you know what? YOU SUCK. And if you dont put this story up on your little crappy message board you are a stupid fat bitch.
See you in hell,

                                               From the baddest
                                                     ass Astro van driver
                                                            out there

For the Idiot that thinks his ASTRO VAN can beat any crappy car
we own I would like to see  him beat my CAMARO.  Some people are just fucking stupid.

Hi there, Thanks for providing this great site for all of us non mini van users so that we can vent our rage.

My friends recently bought a mini van, and they instantly started acting all "weird" they are a 20 something couple with no kids, and as soon as they got it they started talking about how cool it was.  "it's got 8 cup holders!!!! I can have 2 drinks because I have 2 upholders!!!!"  they started driving really shitty, and acting like they were middle-aged soccer moms
(No offense to soccer moms).
I think that if you want to instantly age 10 years and lose all street cred' you should go out and buy one.  I also think that anyone who purchases one should be forced to have a psychiatric examination and a repeat driver's test.

These are not practical vehicles! I always hear about how they have such great visibility, but you know what?..
If all these idiots weren't driving mini vans in the first place we wouldn't HAVE any visibility problems. And if you didn't have so many Cro-Magnon nose picking little brats in the first place you could drive a CAR, and not piss so many people off

I am not going to piss and moan about an inanimate object whose
do's and don'ts are decided by care free drivers who do anything on the road but
drive.  I drive a Saturn, nice and sporty car, and day in and day out I see the
morons who run our roads like the banshees from hell.
THEY piss me off.
THEY are the dangers to our society, the mini van or the sports car or the station
wagon, all are just the weapons these idiots choose to duel with.
Mini Vans are not particularly graceful looking swans on these rivers of asphalt
but I have seen uglier ducklings.  Take the low riders for instance.
These vehicles remind me of a hog, on my grandfather's farm, who's life was spent
wallowing in the muck of mud and feces.  This was an ugly creature; as ugly as the
behemoths whose belly scrapes against the speed bumps in 25 mph zones.
What I am saying is don't be pissed off at the Mini van.  Be pissed off at the drivers who
are insensitive to their surroundings.

I honestly HATE mini vans.  For some strange reason, people feel
that once they get married and knocked up, they are entitled to go out and
purchase one of the most ugly, hulking, unsexy vehicles known to man.
Mini vans should be reserved for businesses and handicap people.  Having
2-3 kids does not justify having one of these vehicles. They are foul!! You
can not pull out of a parking spot with out nearly getting out of you car to
see around them for any oncoming cars. Every time I see a mini van, I see a
has been. A typical oh-dear-lets-run-to-the-mall-suburban person who use to be
a unique  person.  Now they are a drone of the "work force 9-5, let's put
our kids in daycare" person.  I see a person who use to have goals to help
the world, become a society slave, because this is what is expected of
them.  I know of one young lady who once aspired to be a physician who got
pregnant in her first year of marriage, she now wants a mini van because it is
"the right thing to do".   What the hell does that mean? So you are saying
that I have to look like one of these "mousy looking, use to be attractive,
I only get dressed up to go to weddings and funerals, I wear only tennis
and jeans, I have no life drones"?
Now I sit back and I laugh at these people.  The ugly, now-I-am-fat and
unattractive, soccer moms and the beer-gut-nasty-turkey-necked
daddies are now a source of humor for me and my friends.  We do have our
homes, marriages, children, with nice incomes. But we drive sports
cars, sports coupes, cars that we desire. Not a car that society says I must
drive.  My own mother in her 50's even drives a sports car convertible. She
refuses to look like that haggard mother type.  She believes as I do
mini vans are quite unsexy, and god awful, and yes, people are what they drive.

WILD APPLAUSE I love your web site!
Nice to see there are others out there who share my disdain for those yuppie
mobiles!!!

this has to be the most ignorant website i have seen.  the world is going to hell when you all don't have anything
better to do than trash middle class america.  are you all jealous of what we have, whhich by the way is great, or what?
.

Why is it that people who drive those mini vans tend to tailgate? They have a bunch of kids with them and
they still drive like idiots.  It is mainly the woman who drive like a bat out of H...!
Also, the people who drive a mini van speed, cut you off, and leave there turn signal on for miles.

I absolutely cannot stand the morons who write in to say how the world is going to hell just because people have time to create sites 'against middle America'  What-EVER!!!  Are you jealous because you have no imagination or a sense of humor?  See... the f'am-mobile'  has just sucked all of that out of you.  HA!  I think this site is so hilarious!  How dare you DEATH PLOW drivers bash such a unique and entertaining site.  Lighten up fools.....the world isn't getting any friendlier.

I have hated mini vans for years!!! I am convinced that if you are a lousy driver they GIVE you a mini van.
Hulking, ugly moon buses. No style, not the car nor the moron driving. It doesn't help matters that I abhor kids.
Watch, I and my poor little Triumph will be mowed down by a cell phone jabbering mom driving to the video
store while attempting to change a diaper. Retch.

I live in Hawaii where the cost of living and the cost of
housing had me
worried that I might have to live in my car from time to time as
well as
being a living quarters when I'm on one of my outdoor sports
jaunts. The
Toyota minivan I bought was perfect because the seats laid out
into a bed of
sorts (just a bit lumpy) and the rack I put on top carried four
kayaks and
two mountain bikes. Well, now I have two babies and one on the
way and my
time in the outdoors has disappeared but my need of a four door
van has
increased. I would rather vent my frustration at people who
throw cigarette
butts out the window trying to keep their annoying habits out of
their car
and polluting the rivers and oceans for everyone else.

I am not particularly crazy about mini vans but I own one.  Why?
Because I
hate referring 3 boys while I drive.  When I am in the van, they
QUIETLY
and CONTENTEDLY sit and read or act in other civilized manners.
I would
look sooo much cooler cruising around in a Firebird with three
kids
pounding each other in the back seat, but I think I'll keep the
van.

Also, your inane comment about how bad the drivers are in
minivans...how
about all those nice little students who come to Canada from
other
countries to study.  The first thing they do is go out and buy a
sports car
and then drive around in such a manner that they are a menace to
society,
rack up their cars, hike our insurance rates and then high tail
it back to
their motherland with their Doctrates.  Makes me angry!

Some day I will dump the minivan and buy something more fun to
drive, more
sporty
and a whole lot of things the van isn't.  But in the meantime, I
will enjoy
the comfort and convenience of my van because it does better
what no car
could ever hope to do!

I can see it now ,this shallow end of the gene pool
(p.a.m.v)finaly rids the
world of the evil mini van!the new web site becomes
(p.a.f.v)people against
full size vans,when your mission is complete and the world is
safe from this
evil,I guess it will be (p.a.s.u.v),next it will be (p.a.p.u)I
guess the
world is free of all evil!But wait people against stupid crap is
not
satisfied!they feel the need to choose our living space,what we
eat and so
on!I just think you paranoid pinheads need a doctor ,a lot of
prozac and
very desperately you need to get a
life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey great web page!  I like to see a place where people can share their opposing views without interference.   I
have to make a few comments since I'm now a minivan owner. . .  as well as a drag racer and high performance
freak!  When my mini pulls out into traffic,   chances are you will be hard pressed to keep up!

  To the guy with a the Camaro,  don't be too quick to judge minivans when it comes to straight line
performance!  As of August 99,  my 87 V8 Astro is running low-low 14's at 97+ mph in the 1/4.  You can see it
at ASTRONEWS.     I also know of a Dodge caravan (I consider these a
MINI-mini-van) that is running low 13's at well over 100 mph and has ran way into the 12's on a little spray!
You can see his van at MINI !

 Some minivans deserve respect,  but to all of those other minivans out there...  blah!  Especially those
unlovable Ford Aerostars!!

I live in the Washington, DC metro area and I have to drive the surrounding beltway every day. We are #2 in bad
traffic right behind Los Angeles. Mini vans plague this town. I compare a mini van on the road as a cockroach
scurrying around on the floor. I have been behind too many of those damned things. More than once I have been
behind one, the driver is reaching back beating their kids and not paying attention to the road, and then all of the
sudden I see brake lights. Thank goodness I have ABS.

For a period of time I had a delivery job and I got behind those things toting around the suburbs one too many
times. When the speed limit is 35 they will go 32. It drove me nuts. Too much of that pushed me over the edge. I
despise mini vans to this day.

I assume mini van drivers have half a brain and I drive accordingly to assure that my car does not get hit by one. I
am a very considerate driver. I do not tailgate and I use my turn signal when I change lanes. When a mini van cuts
in front of me, not using its turn signal, I turn into the aggressive driver that plagues news reports. I consider it the
best approach to get in front of the mini van by any means necessary. The drivers are too dumb and too unsafe for
me to trust them to brake in enough time in event of a sudden stop. I am actually surprised when I see a
considerate mini van driver. I assume it's a rental.

Note too all mini van drivers in the D.C. Metro area: in event that you are stupid and you cut in front of me and you
see an Acura pull up next to you and throw something at you out of a sunroof...that's just me paying my disrespect
to you. I despise you solely by the fact that you drive a mini van. I am sure you are a very nice person, but based on
the rules of the road I see you as an incompetent idiot driving a box with wheels. I am only acting in accordance to
too many instances of threats to my personal safety. If you buy any other vehicle, signal that you want to get over a
lane in bumper to bumper traffic, I will be that person who slows down so you can change lanes. If you drive a
mini van, I will speed up based on the threat that your piece of crap will be in front of my car and I will have to worry
about you slamming on your brakes because of your daily inattentive driving habits.

If I see a mini van broken down on the side of the road, I smile. If I see a fender bender with a mini van involved
(mind you, not a serious accident) I will roll down my window and yell, "It's the mini van's fault! It always is!"

Please consider this in your next vehicle purchase...you are driving what is a roach. People like to step on
roaches because they are foul and disgusting.

AMAZING! I TYPE IN " I HATE MINI VANS" ON MY SEARCH ENGINE, AND AM GRATIFIED TO SEE
THAT OTHER SANE, RATIONAL PEOPLE OUT THERE DESPISE THE BARNEYMOBILE AS MUCH AS I
DO. MINI VAN DEALERS SHOULD BE SUBJECT TO MANDATORY EUTHANASIA, AND THEIR
"DRIVERS" LOCKED IN A PADDED ROOM WITH 200 SCREAMING, DRIBBLING, WHINING BRATS (AND
NO BATHROOM...) I HATE MINI VANS FOR MORE REASONS THAN I CAN COUNT, BUT THESE ARE A
FEW...

1. THEY DRIVE LIKE THE LIVING DEAD (20 KM/H UNDER THE SPEED LIMIT...)
2. YOU CAN'T SEE AROUND THEM (I'M SURE AN BAZOOKA COULD SOLVE THIS PROBLEM...)
3. THEY CAN'T PARK WITHOUT TAKING 1 1/2 TO 2 PARKING SPACES, BECAUSE THE DRIVER IS INCOMPETENT...
4. FAT PEOPLE DRIVE THEM...
5. WHEN THEIR CARGO OF INSIPID RUG RATS EXIT THE VEHICLE, THEY PUT DENTS IN MY F*****G CAR...
6. THEY PLAY THEIR BARNEY MUSIC SO LOUD, I NEED 1200 WATTS OF STEREO SYSTEM TO DROWN IT OUT...
7. THEY ALL LOOK THE SAME...
8. LAST BUT NOT LEAST, THEY'RE UGLYUGLYUGLYUGLYUGLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. F.A.V STANDS FOR "FAMILY ASSAULT VEHICLE" IF YOU WERE CURIOUS... DEATH TO ALL
MINI VANS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Please let it be known on your site that I need a mini van terribally..I will buy it for  $3,000...Thanks

I think all of you idiots posting these hate filled messages about
minivans
and their drivers are in reality angry about your own miserable
situations in
life, and like any other loser, must find someone else to blame.

Grow up people, if you don't want to share the road with everyone,
sell your
cars and walk. But then you will most likely find something else to
bitch
about, like kids riding tricycles on the sidewalk.

The U.S. Census Bureau announced today (10/19/99) that my home state,
Minnesota, is the No. 1 state in the union when it comes to mini vans.
There is one mini van for every 10.92 licensed drivers.  It seems like
one out of every four vehicles on the road is one of these dreaded
pieces of crap.  Here in America we all have the right to choose and
buy whichever vehicle we want, which is the way it should be.
However, if you choose to drive one of these overgrown station wagons
please stay the hell out of the left hand lane on the freeways.
Please stay in the right hand lanes so you can eat, drink, talk on the
phone, swat your kids, etc.  The left hand lane is for fast moving
vehicles and passing.  Nine out of ten left hand lane traffic
blockages in MN are caused by mini vans.

I was recently on a business trip to Las Vegas with three other
co-workers.  Right off the bat, I'd decided that we'd rent a mini van
so
there'd be enough room for all our bags.  It was interesting because
most people treat mini vans like they belong in the slow lane.  I
thought
that I'd kill that stereotype by breaking every traffic and speed law
possible.  Often times, I'd even drive on the dirt shoulder just to
pass
some weirded out couple in a Cadillac.  I put that rental mini van to
good use by driving the shit out of it and using it as an SUV rather
than a mini van.  It's NOT the mini van itself.... it's the friggen
idiots
who are mostly driving them.
Pete

What is it with Mini Van Drivers?  Everywhere I turn, I see Kids floating free in the backs of Mini Van's.  Don't
these People Know that these Kids are projectiles waiting to be launched through the vehicle at the first Quick stop.
Buckle Up these Little Carpet Munchers before the go flying through the back of some Moms Head.

If these soccer vans are so damned great, why is the one in front of
me
always going ten miles under the speed of traffic and the one behind me
always
ten miles faster than the ACD from my rear bumper?  Why is the female
driving
always looking back to yell at her passengers?  Why is the guy driving
one
always yacking on his cell phone while looking down at the notes he's
scribbling, while ignoring the fact that he is too close to my car?
And why
the hell don't they watch before blowing onto thoroughfares from
driveways?

Mini vans make me see RED!  I drive for a
living, and live in Columbus, Ohio.  It never
seems to amaze me that a mini van driver
can drive in the PASSING LANE at 5 mph
BELOW THE SPEED LIMIT, and not even
notice the line of traffic building up behind
them.  They seem oblivious to the fact that
there is nothing but OPEN HIGHWAY ahead
of them, and the rest of the state waiting to
get around them.  Take off the frigging
blinders and move your ass over in the slow
(minded) lane where you belong.  Just
because you have all day to get Precious to
Chucky Cheese', use your little head and
realize that the rest of us have a job to do
and a life to live, and the hour I save by not
sitting behind your slow ignorant butt I really
cherish.  In closing, realize your handicap,
and don't impose it on the rest of us.

Your friend,
                    The CoffeeMan

We own a 1988 Chev Astro. Ugly and bumpy, like a truck--coz it IS a
truck, not a true mini-van. Proof? Rear-wheel drive, heavy-duty towing
capacity. But what a sad excuse for an engine the 4.3 litre V6.
Solution? Stuff in a V8. 305s and 350s fit. I'm about to put a 305
from
a Camaro IROC into our Astro. 300 hp plus. With the 5-speed manual and
the extra weight to stop it from pitching like a dinghy in a gale, it
should be both practical (size) and fast--but still ugly. So to all
you
people who hate minivans, I sympathize--most are driven badly by
distracted people, poor things. Most are hopelessly underpowered,
handle
badly, look worse. Many of the ranters seem to have an aesthetic
problem
with minivans, but are so worked up that they can express only rage,
not
distaste. Poor things. Save your rage for something that deserves it,
like lo-fat ice cream or Hyundais.

I am a single mother and have been driving for over 25 years with my
vehicles consisting of fast sporty cars, well I now have two children
going into their teen years, I plan on keeping my 82 Trans Am Cross
Fire
Infection car, but I am also in the midst of purchasing my first
minivan.
I am neither fat nor ugly I am 5 feet and 105 pounds, I am an
excellent
driver, the only time I have been in an accident has been the other
persons fault (they were drunk) and driving a 4X4 TRUCK.  I love speed
when I drive, but I also like comfort.  I look forward to having a
minivan and being able to transport my children without listening to
them complain about having no where to put their feet, also to be able
to say yes if they have a friend or two that want to go with us.  You
just can't transport your family in any kind of comfort in a car.  To
the person that feels people that have kids are crazy obviously has
never had the opportunity to enjoy the pleasures of being a parent, as
children are the most wonderful gift a person can receive, children
give
meaning to life and only an ignorant(unknowing) person would make
comments against having a family.  If you do not have
family......."WHAT
DO YOU HAVE".......a meaningless life, void and empty.  MINIVANS
RULE.....THEY WILL DO THE SPEED LIMIT OR BETTER......PEOPLE WHO DRIVE
THEM LIKE IDIOTS ARE IDIOTS, IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE VEHICLE, AS
THESE PEOPLE WOULD BE A HAZARD ON THE ROAD EVEN IF THEY WERE DRIVING A
CAR OR A TRUCK INSTEAD OF A MINIVAN.....MAYBE EVEN MORESO.
It is really too bad there are so many shallow minded people in our
society.
YOU PEOPLE WHO HATE MINIVANS MAYBE SHOULD GET SOME HELP TO FIND OUT
EXACTLY WHY YOU FEEL SO THREATENED BY OTHER PEOPLE ON THE ROAD, MAYBE
YOU NEED TO TURN IN YOUR LICENSE, AS YOU ARE PROBABLY MORE OF A HAZARD
ON THE ROAD THEN ANYONE ELSE AS YOU HAVE A MAJOR ATTITUDE PROBLEM AND
IT
MOST LIKELY SHOWS IN YOUR ABILITY TO "SHARE THE ROAD".

I have to agree with the hot rodded astro van. I to am purchassing a
new
2000 astro van, CAN'T WAIT.Further more, I would like to challange the
thinking of those that appose the beloved mini. We have in our garage
a
1969 Pontiac convertable firebird with 300 ponies under the hood, and
would be more than happy to run it against any little wana be that
thinks there yuppie mobile has what it takes. We also have a rather
cool
4x4 as well. Does this make us really that uncool????? I THINK NOT!!!

OK, THAT IS IT!! First off, the haggard woman with the 82 Trans Am
“whatever whatever with the bold type” car is exactly the type of
typical bullshit people we hate! Lady… get a clue! Maybe the fact that
since you can not find a spouse (oh single woman with the spread open
legs, who could not help but reproduce before finding a decent family
unit to raise her womb fruit) makes you evil and stupid, but your
ignorance is not welcomed here. I give permission to anyone to flame
this poor example of a real woman. Who gives a crap about your ability
to have avoided accidents that were not your fault? The purpose of the
page is to yell, rampage, and spit fire at the most disgusting vehicle
on this earth. It is a product of middle-america (Yes I said it –and I
will say it again), for those who deemed it necessary that since you
HAD to have childruuuunnnn, you have to try upset everyone else by
actually wasting your money on a MINIVAN. Honestly, what good reason
did you have for buying a minivan?  Are you actually saying that you
HAD to buy a minivan? You just knew deep in your soul, “oh dear, I
have to buy a minivan”. You would have been better buying an SUV or
something that can give you at least (what you are lacking) some class
and dignity. And what kind of mother are you? If your children HAD to
learn to ride in a car or a truck, where is your discipline when they
start  bitchin’ & whinin’? They should learn to behave. If you can't
be a woman, at least pretend to be one for your kid's sake.

And what is with the “oh please populate our world” speech? Now, not
only is she plugging the minivan, but, she is now saying “as children
are the most wonderful gift a person can receive, children give
meaning to life and only an ignorant (unknowing) person would make
comments against having a family. If you do not have family "WHAT DO
YOU HAVE"....a meaningless life, void and empty.  Just remember folks,
this is an unwed, single mother! She is preaching to us about the
"virtues" of the minivan, when she has left hers at the bed of a man
who sperm donated her chilldruuuunnn OK and the lesson is WHAT?? Help
me out here! WHAT A BITCH!
On the other side of the spectrum, may I formally say  “Not buying a
brat box (aka minivan) is the most wonderful things a person can do
for themselves, instead we celebrate by purchasing sports cars, SUV’s,
or any car with style and only an ignorant (possibly jealous) person
would make comments promoting or caught buying a minivan. If you have
a minivan "WHAT DO YOU HAVE"....a meaningless life, void and empty.

Maybe YOU should get some help to find out exactly why you feel so
threatened by this web page (and others who feel even remotely bothered
by it).  Maybe you need to turn in your uterus, as you are probably
more of a hazard then anyone else on this board. You are the one with
the major attitude problem and it most likely shows in your inability
to comprehend that this is a board that “hates minivans” and anyone
who disagrees can kiss off.  You do not belong here any more than we
belong on a web page spewing the option features and price tags of
minivans. We have this right. Just as we have the right to remain
childless, suburbia less, spouseless (which I am not), and most of all
happy. Now go the fuck away!

From one woman (bitchy, rude, haggard, I say, h-a-g-g-a-r-d) to
another (married, gorgeous, child free, and minivan free woman about to
trade in her 3000GT for a Viper or maybe a nice SUV…in case I decide
to have a child or two.)

To begin i could give two shits about
minivans...they're out
there and they are sometimes piloted by those with small brains with
phones
attached to their head and kids flying all around the cabin....anyway
my
simple and main complaint is to the first respondent to the Trans Am
lady
who claimed that any opinion she had was null and void simply because
she
was a single mother...being a child raised mostly by my mom who is
divorced
"twice" (oh shit im a going to hell and jerry falwell gonna make sure
i do)
and i feel that the love she gave me was the only important factor in
my
raising.  I have no inclinations to commit murder or grand theft
whatever.
To imply that someone's entire existence is void due to single
motherhood is
right up there with ideals held by a man named Hitler or
Reagan/bush/Quayle/falwell/rooney..its all the same..thanks for being
so
ignorant....I hope someone "backs you up" all the way to your
loneliness

I own a maroon Aerostar and hate the damn thing like it is cancer.
I have no choice but to drive it because insurance is so flipping
expensive. The thing that truly galls me though is every day I
climb into the van I have to look at my white Z-28 camaro in the
driveway .I don't care who you are once you drive a sports car that
handles like that one does it hurts to drive anything else
(p.s.-first day I drove the van I almost  flipped it)

Wow.  I was amazed at this site.  Society has convinced you that
you are or
are not a better person based on what you drive.  You people have
issues.
Here's a thought, why don't you take a deep breath and enjoy the
fact that
you are alive.  Enjoy where you're going and where you've been.
Not what it
is that takes to get you there.  If what you drive is so
important, you need
to re-evaluate your life.  Drive on a race track if speed is your
adrenaline
rush.  If someone in the fast lane slows you down take a look at
how much
time you actually lost by it.  Seconds? Minutes?  All you have
done is
stressed yourself and maybe irritated others when you got to
where you were
going.  Streets are made for commuting, getting there with style
and
integrity is up to you.  Don't judge people on what they drive,
it doesn't
really matter.  If you must know, I don't have a mini van, I do
however have
a life, and it will be the only one that I will get.  I plan on
having fun
going fast in places where I can, having as many friends as I
possibly can,
and enjoying every minute of the family that I got.  I'm not
religious,  but
I am in touch with reality.  You people who criticize others and
me, go
ahead, you make a great bad example. I hope that I have helped
someone out there.

I was struck from behind and was forced into a tree while i was driving a -$hitty piece of junk mini van

  The whole truck is an accordion it buckled around me like aluminum foil . THEY SUCK!!!!!!!!!!

         I'll never buy another one. They handle badly in the rain, they have no power,

                    And they look funny.        sincerely: MR.LAMONICO

I have a friend who listened to my minivan rants enough to make
me a bumper
sticker.  It says, "Satan Drives a Minivan."

There is a saying that we have in the Marine Corps, "There's
always that
10%." Well I guess I am one of piece of that ten percent. I drive
a minivan.
There I said it. Not that I like admitting that I am a minivan
driver,
however, there is a necessity for it in my household.
     Firstly, let me start off by saying that, in reading all the
message board
entries, you people don't have a problem with the minivans. Most
of the
entries I read referred to children as evil little beasts and
other colorful
terms that you deemed necessary to tag to an impressionable mind.
Let me make
two points and then i will get to the meat of it.
   1. Those mindless little cretins you are refering to will be
the future of
our society.
   2. The only frothing evil creatures in the world are those
with parents who
have ascertained a certain rock-bottom level of parenting.
     O.K. here it is. You people aren't mad at minivans. Though,
I must admit
even I can't bare to look at its totally unappealing design. You
are mad at
the drivers of those minivans. I drive my minivan like I'm on a
drag strip.
Its a 98 Pontiac Transport. Even though I don't like the style
the engine is
definitely a nice smooth running piece of work. Pontiac does it
again. It has
all the pull that my "parent-trap" needs to get up and going.
     What bothers me is that the people who are writing these
mindless,
unresearched and poorly thought-up comments obviously are
suffering from lack
of sex. I suppose you are going to tell me that its O.K when you
zip out on a
Friday night in your little Honda Accord with the wheels poking
out so far
from the car that the axle starts to bow and your little chrome
exhaust tips
that do absolutely nothing to the horsepower of your vehicle and
go pick up
some chick in the bar and take her to your house for a little one
night stand.
But its not O.K. for a person to have a family of children and
actually make a
commitment of some type, whether it be to her  or his children
which were born
out of wedlock, or to a husband and wife who want to have someone
to be proud
of, watch grow, and carry on their family name. See, from the
looks of what
you all said, there is a deep built sexual frustration. Don't be
mad at the
minivan driver because they are getting their fare share of sex.
Your turn
will come too I promise.
     Now, I have six children living in my house. For that
reason, I see a
need to have a minivan. I don't like it nor does my significant
other,
however, it is a NECESSITY. Want another surprise,
"stereotypers." One of the
six children isn't even my own child. She is a friend of ours who
is living
with us because she didn't want to move with her mother and she
said it would
be alright for her to stay here with us.
     I don't drive that van like a Pontiac Transport. I drive it
like a Trans
Am. I don't leave the turn signal on. I speed up when i change
lanes. I am a
very proficient driver and speeder for that matter.
     The problem isn't so much the Minivan, other than the fact
its an
absolute horror to look at, it is the driver. I don't think a
mother with One
or Two children needs a minivan. Three or more, I could see the
necessity. Old
people! Alot more lately I see Grandma and Grandpa driving the
minivans. Hell,
they were bad enough in their old 1970 Buicks. Remember those big
old boats? I
guess they traded those in for the new style caddilac, the
minivan.
     Fat people are not the only people to drive minivans. I know
it seems
like that's all you see in them but remember that there are
reports out there
that say over half the American population is obese. That could
mean you too.
You may want to watch who you are classifying as fat. I don't say
that because
I am fat. I am a U.S. Marine. Fat is not allowed in the Corps.
     I don't care what kind of vehicle you are driving, a vehicle
is not a
place for a phone. They just don't have phones in minivans. I'd
be willing to
bet that half of you that wrote in destroying the people who had
cell phones
in their minivans also have cell phones in your cars. That is not
a good mix
in ANY vehicle you drive.
     As for the screaming heathons you spoke about, If you
discipline your
children properly, that won't be a problem. How is it that I can
settle 8
people into my minivan and not have to speak to them once during
the entire
time we are in the vehicle. The problem comes in when, Momma Jane
starts lil'
Joey off with "timeouts" and "using their inside voice" instead
of being firm,
fair and consistence from the get-go. Then when lil' Joey gets
bigger, He
realized Mommy doesn't have much control over lil' Joey anymore
and he figures
he'll do what the hell he wants. So what is mom going to do spank
him now? I
don't think so. I usually end up dealing with Momma's problem. I
am a drill
instructor for a public school, believe me I know what I am
talking about.
    In closing, I hate my minivan but hell it serves a purpose. I
don't like
how it looks. I don't like the way the seats are or any of the
crap in it
except for the cd player. That is really nice. But the engine I
would keep in
a heartbeat and it safely and effectively moves from point a to
point b
without a fuss. Furthermore, I will run the dog crap out of that
engine. I
plan to continue to drive it like a Trans Am. So get the hell out
of my way,
Very competent and offensive minivan driver rollin through.

I'd like to know how in the HELL you expect me to haul my
wife and four
kids in anything but a minivan?  Obviously you have WAY too much
time on your
hands.  Why don't you do something productive with all of your
time - like
save the rain forest.  What kind of miserable life do you have
that you have
to complain about something as stupid as this?   Man I hate
people who feel
they have a problem with something and can't function properly
without
blabbing it to everyone.  I think you need some serious help -
you obviously
didn't get enough attention from your parents.

Signed-

One weekend my friends and I were traveling down from the
mountains.  We
were on a very narrow winding road littered with "SLOWER TRAFFIC
USE
PULLOUTS" signs and about 40 pullouts over a thirty mile
distance.  The
first few slow cars moved over for me but then there was the
green minivan.
This van was packed with the whole family even the grandparents.
It was
traveling at half the speed limit and was riding the brakes (even
on uphill
slopes).  After we passed a few signs and some pullouts I became
irritated.
All of us in my car started pointing and then honking at the
pullouts and
the signs.  And the minivan just kept going. We then drove with
the horn
held down.  Didn't do anything.  When we finally got to the base
of the
mountain and were able to pass them, everyone in my car stuck
both of their
hands out the window with their middle fingers displayed.  I
wonder if there
are any stats. on how many minivan drivers are victims of road
rage?

I haven't visited your site for a while, and thought it was time to see if the style impaired of the world have added any words of wisdom to this very funny page. As funny as the stories by us minivan haters are, it's the pathetic attempts at self justification by the minivan OWNERS that keep me coming back.
Contrary to what the resident jarhead says, I think it is those of you who have purchased these foul, lumbering, stale, wheeled shoe boxes who have the issues...
The very fact that they are spending their time getting into flame wars over their POS minivans shows a deep rooted insecurity with the hollow, phony lives they lead; they must justify being suburbanized drones, both to the world, and to themselves, or they will realize that they have been lied to by a society that says that our only purpose is to conform, pay our taxes, propagate, and enter an outmoded, pathetic rip off called "marriage".
Hence, to them, anyone who refuses to do so is "selfish", or "empty", or "sexually frustrated"...

P.S. Again to the minivan marine... I have dated the same girl for two years, we ARE NOT getting married, NOT having childruuun, and we both drive SPORTS CARS!!!
Jealous yet???
Sorry, gotta go, I think I'll go have sex now, and then have a nap... You could do the same, but you gotta take the brood to the mall for diapers, Pokemon toys, and clean spitup off the floor, right? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

"If you have more than three kids, you need a minivan."

When are all you minivan-drivin' rabbits gonna realize
that you don't live in an agrarian society or one that
is driven by cottage industries.  You do not need to
have more than two kids.

I must say this has been a very colorful introduction by many
people of
themselves.  First I have to say that my beloved NISSAN was hit
and
killed and been sent to the big NISSAN graveyard in the
sky.....the
unforgiving assailant was a minivan who rear ended us at 70 MPH
on the
Alaskan HWY.  This incident was in the month of February....can we
say
black ice.  The curious thing is this....upon exiting his minivan
the
driver upon seeing my two children on the side of the road at 30
below......says to my husband...."did you see snowmobile lights
in the
ditch?"   Needless to say we were quite at a loss for words at
that.  I
have since replaced my beloved NISSAN with another NISSAN....only
this
one is a NISSAN QUEST MINIVAN!!!!!!!!!!!  I am now going to be
the
driver of the unforgiving juggernaut that destroys someone's prize
car.
This is my REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!  To my fellow friends who drive
those 4 WD
trucks and SUVs......I am so sorry to see you in the ditch all
winter
long all down the Alaskan Highways and Byways as I drive smooth
and
carefree in my big warm DEVIL MOBILE.  A minivan kicked my ass
once....NEVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!

Hi all you mini van haters.  This is one recent convert (from an
'83 Toyota
Corrolla Wagon) that hopes you are all non-breeders as well as
mini van
haters.

Remember, our children are meant to further the evolution of the
human
species…. Not maintain or regress the evolution that we have
already
attained.

Accessibility, visibility and handling are all valuable tools of
the
defensive driver.  That's accessibility to make it easier to get
the rug
rats and/or gear in and out.  Visibility so you can see what the
offensive,
road enraged cavemen that drive Z24s and camaro style vehicles
are doing
(and believe us when we say we like to see you in front of us so
we know
what bonehead move you're pulling next and avoid it).  And
handling-you
know turning, stopping, accelerating, driving in adverse
conditions, etc.

The point is, there's a new sheriff and posse in town, and they
have a
group called People In Mini Vans Against Allowing People Against
Mini Vans
To Breed (PIMVAAPAMVTB).  PLEASE REMEMBER THAT THIS ALSO INCLUDES
IN-BREEDING.

Only two mini-vans have aced the crash tests (40 mph head on).
Those are the
Toyota Sienna and the Ford Windstar.  All others are veritable
coffins on
wheels--death traps!   Take care.  Jay D. Anderson

Ok my friends parents just bought one of those fancy new
minivans.  You
know, the ones with 867 cup holders, room for a damn hockey team,
that big
muscular 2.8 litre engine which provides a huge wooping 160
ponies.  Yah I
enjoy the 0-60 times of about 4 minutes in that beast of a power
van.  So
he's cruisin down the highway at about 100km/h(yep even us damn
Canadian
have the problem), and im following him with my 1996 T-Bird (my
pride and
joy).  The day is perfect, suns shining, about 85 outside, I go
to pass
him, and I guess when you have 18 windows in a vehicle its hard
to see a
purple car pull out to pass, well he says a little gust of wind
caught him,
because you know, those 10km/h wind gusts throw those vans all
over the
road, and needless to say, as I was right beside him, I got a
nice close up
of a red van ripping the side of my $3000 paint jobbed car and
spreading it
all over the road for the wildlife.  I love minivans, I love them
enough to
almost lose it every time I see one.
-----------------------------------------------------
Click here for two free plane tickets:

Today is a very sad day for me. Yes, I went to look for the
dreaded Minivan!!
I feel that unfortunately, I have been pushed into this position
by the
"Airbag" dilemma...and that is, if you have more than one child,
and ever in
your life plan on inviting any children over to play, or have to
carpool
(ever in your entire life), then you are faced with the airbag
dilemma. I
have detested minivans for years and swore them off forever. Then
this year I
opened my own preschool, and I came to realize pretty darn quick
that in an
emergency or for field trips, I am stuck! I have a Subaru, but it
has a front
seat air bag, so I can only fit three children in the back-and
not very
comfortably!! The air bag is a safety feature, I realize it's
value, but it
really limits those of us who despise the idea of owning a
Minivan!!!

hey, i'm a 16/male from Atlanta, GA and I hate minivans My mom has a '94
Plymouth Grand Voyager and it's a pretty nice car to tell you the truth but I
wouldn't be caught dead driving it.
 Then, the other day I was car shopping. My dad saw a minivan and
he wanted to know if I'd like  something like it. Well, of course I said HELL NO and then we went on looking for other cars.
 My dad said that he liked it and I should get it because it looked 'sporty'. My ass. Minivans are less sporty than station wagons no matter what kinda wheels
they have. So since it was MY money and not my father's I just went with my mom and bough a car I got a 1993 Chevy  Cavalier Z24 and it's great. It's pretty pathetic when your dad likes minivans and your mom lets you get a sports car.

  why a minivan?                                                                                                          Tue, 08 Feb 2000

I just have a really hard time understanding why someone would buy a minivan
if they really didn't need one.  Of course, I know there are families out there with like 30 kids who need a lot of seating and also because of that can't afford anything else.
But why would anyone in their right mind buy a minivan if they didn't absolutely need to?
 To me, a minivan is a last resort.  Why not choose an SUV as an alternative?
They are about the same size, can have the same amount of seating, and are generally much
"cooler" than a minivan.
A large car could also be a good alternative if you want some room or safety.  How safe are minivans if hit from behind?  What happens when your children are sitting in the rear seat of the minivan and you happen to get hit from behind?
 A car with a trunk is safer in those sort of situations than a minivan, right?
 And also... I read someone mention something about the visibility... minivans aren't the
only vehicle  that are higher up off the ground with better visibility.  Try an
SUV, or a  pick up truck.  Many pick up trucks even come with back seats now.
I'll close by saying I still don't know why some people are driving around out there in those things when they don't absolutely have to.
 I certainly never intend to buy one.

Jarhead?                                                                                                                         Fri, 11 Feb 2000

Hey, y'all, I've posted here before, and just  stopped in for an update. I'm still a lawyer,
married to a doctor, driving a black sporty car and hating minivans. I must however,
take issue with the kid who used the pejorative term "Jarhead" in reference to the
minivan-driving Marine.

Fuck you, lad. Staying with the same girl for two years and driving an alleged "sports
car" (what, a Mitsubishi eclipse? Very popular with the 15-year-old set . . . ) is probably
the pinnacle of your lifetime achievement. I served 22 years in the Corps, and you
wouldn't make a pimple on a good Marine's ass. Say what you will about minivans, but
don't you dare run down a United States Marine, shitbird. You are fucking clueless.

pamv                                                                                                                                Fri, 11 Feb 2000

Soccer Mom Barbie.
All that experience as a cheerleader is really paying off
as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken Jr.
Comes with mini van in robin-egg blue or white,
and  cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.

Mini-vans . . . a pox upon us!                                                                                      Mon, 20 Mar 2000

This website is perhaps the greatest accomplishment since the advent of the E-Universe.
I hate mini-vans not because they are generally driven slowly
(whenever I look in my rear-view it seems another Dodge Astro or whatever is running up my tailpipe), but because they represent to me a sort of mushy, repugnant "comfort mindset" among middlebrow Americans, who think that--since they own what the advertising machine tells
them they must (if they really "care" about their screwball kids, anyway)-- then they are "okay". The implication, of course, is that anyone who doesn't drive a mini-van is some sort of subversive, anti-family freak who should be shot. In reality, these grotesque simps who buy
into the manufactured "need" to own a mini-van are the ones who need to be put in jail.
They add nothing to society but more consuming maws, like pea brained little birdies in a big nest of advertising vipers.
And I don't buy the whiny crap about "Well, it was just the best thing for me and my family." Whatever happened to the big old wood sided station wagons of my youth?
How unpretentious they were compared to mini-vans, which are, if you haven't noticed, simply transmogrifying back into station wagons anyway.

minivans                                                                                                                          Mon, 3 Apr 2000
 
 
 

                                               What a stupid website! Get a life!
 
 

Take a look at this proper MINI- van and tell me if you still hate them.

Here's an unbelievable yet true minivan story from Pittsburgh.  My friend and I went to dinner at a Mexican restaurant one evening.  The parking lot in the plaza where the restaurant is located is always packed.
As I drove towards the restaurant I saw a prime parking spot in front about to open.
 A father and child were leaving, and yes they had a minivan.  I pulled along side the parking
spot and put on my turn signal.  The father and balloon carrying child got into the van.  Then, the mother came straggling along in front of my car.  We sit with the turn signal blinking.
 Just when we think they're going to leave, here come more family members, grandmother, another child, etc.,walking in front of the car.  They get into the minivan.  And we sit with the turn signal blinking.  Just when we think they're going to leave, the father and mother jump back out of the minivan.  They go around to the back and put the hatch up.  The mother takes a flimsy styrofoam to-go container and puts it in the net on the back of the seat which also contains a stroller and some other random junk!

My friend and I start laughing hysterically.  We could picture them driving down the road, the
stroller falling over, and Mexican left-overs spraying all over the minivan.  The mother realizes
how stupid this move is and removes the to-go container.  Then, she starts rearranging the stroller and other items in the net.  The father gets back into the minivan.  The mother goes around to the side of the minivan to send the to-go container through the side door, hatch-back still up.  And we sit with the turn signal blinking.  My friend and I had sat there for so long and we were so annoyed that we just had to stay and see what this crazed minivan family was going to do next, even though we knew we should probably just park elsewhere.

Watching this situation was like ingesting a powerful drug.  As much as we knew we should stop the madness, we continued to watch - absolutely addicted!
We were laughing, yelling, etc.  It was winter and the windows were up, but our roars of
laughter shook the car.  Back to the mother...  What else could she possibly have up her sleeve????

Well, here she comes around to the back of the minivan carrying a guitar case!  Yes, a full-sized
guitar case!  Where did THAT come from!!!??? We couldn't believe it.  Our roars of laughter turned to screams and tears.  Our stomachs ached because we were laughing so hard.  The mother tries to stuff the guitar case in the net!  With the stroller!  More roars of laughter.  My turn signal  was still blinking.  She realizes that there's no way the guitar case is going to fit.  So, she starts pushing it over top of the seat where the grandmother, balloon carrying children, and other numerous people who managed to sneak by us - are sitting!  Again, it dawns on her that this isn't a great idea.  Back she goes around to the side again with guitar case in hand.  We didn't have that vantage point.  All we know is that the guitar case was stuffed back into the minivan through the side door (where could it have possibly fit???) because the mother came around to the back of the minivan empty handed.  And still we sit with the turn signal blinking.

 The mother closed the hatch-back, went around to the side for the final time, and the father threw it into reverse.  I could barely pull into the parking spot I was so weak from laughing.  During this entire episode the minivan family never acknowledged us or sped up their minivan packing process.   Elapsed time...over 10 MINUTES!

This is NOT an exaggeration.  We timed it.  If nothing else,

I have to drive to work through a lovely area of Colorado Springs
where a mini-van in the driveway seems to be a pre-requisite of home ownership -
Briargate!
These drivers seem to have been initiated into a private class of morons who
drive only in the left lane of traffic, 10 MPH under the posted speed limit, with a cell phone permanently attached to their heads.  The also have the right to cut off all motorists in whatever lane they choose and continue to the nearest mall,  Wal-Mart or elementary school,  without the
bother of turn signals.  Many of these drivers also sport silly little fish on the rear end
of their vehicles which seems to give them special rights to create their own traffic rules!

These wonderful vehicles offer size, comfort, and safety, they
are not
overly pretentious so what is the the bitch? in reality you
probably
wish you had one rather than the shit box you are driving.

clueless                                                                                                                        Mon, 08 May 2000

You all have a right to feel how you want about mini
vans, but I LOVE mine.
Here's my favorite story:  It was terrible out. It
had been snowing for over a week, and the roads were covered with
ice. I was driving to work, taking my time with my AWD, when this
IDIOT decided I wasn't going fast enough on the icy roads. So he decides
to pass me.
Fine with me, I didn't like him tailgating me anyway. I
just kept taking my time and about 5 miles down the road I see the nifty
little sports car sitting in the 4 ft. ditch. Soooo, I just waved as I
went on to work, and he sat in the snow!!!

minivans                                                                                                                       Thu, 11 May 2000

What is up with you people?  I have a minivan for one
reason-3 kids.  And
yes asswipes, having kids is a good reason to have one.
Where else would I
put them?  Not in my camaro (which I got rid of to get
the van). This camaro
was a show car and very sharp! But some of us care more
about our kids then
a vehicle! And for you people who say we are ugly-what
do you look like? I
am a very attractive 27 year old.  My boyfriend is a
bodybuilder and very
attractive.  No fatness there. Then there's the people
who say we can't
afford anything else. Are you living on Mars? Have you
seen the prices of
new minivans lately? I am a cool person period. Doesn't
have anything to do
with what I drive. I have tattoos, party just like the
next person, and have
had my share of body piercings. And I don't drive like a
turtle or leave my
blinker on forever(yes that irritates me too).I have a
hell of a stereo in
it and don't talk on a cell phone.  My kids are cool
too(for you pond scum
that said kids are nose picking brats). If people didn't
have kids, your ass
wouldn't be here! DUH! Leave minivan drivers alone and
bitch about something
else like drivers who flick their cigarettes out of
their windows for them
to fly in other peoples cars.

Mustang vs. minivan, hmmmmm.                                                                               Mon, 15 May 2000

Yeah, I'm not too fond of minivans, either, but
I own one.  It is a
necessary evil appliance!  With a spouse, three teenage
daughters, and a
dalmatian, well, you do the math.  Last summer I sold my
two-year-old
purple Mustang GT largely because I got great cash for
it, but hey, when
two of your kids are jocks and play multiple games per
week, and one of
them plays field hockey and ice hockey year round, with
a huge, 60-pound
goalie bag and two sticks, where does this all fit in a
Mustang?  HELLO!
IT DOESN'T!  Next Sunday, we have an ice hockey game at
9:30am, and at
2:00pm, halfway across the state, USA Field Hockey
Olympic Futures
Program, meaning TWO Goalie bags and FOUR sticks!!! Not
only that, but
my driving habits (fast) haven't changed, but my
Valentine One
radar/laser detector still works fine, just only about
10 per cent as
much as in a Mustang, you know: "What minivan(stealth
vehicle, blends
in)?", versus "Guilty until proven innocent!"  Between
all the sports
events and two comfortable round trips From New
Hampshire to Florida, my
13 month old Caravan has 26,000 miles on it.  That means
within three
years, the van will be "old" and I'll be back into the
NEXT generation
Mustang GT.....   :)  Dave

Silly rabbit, procreation is for the strong                                                                 Wed, 17 May 2000

I have changed my stance on breeding since reading this
page.  I have turned
my back on the revolution and hung up my Culture
Jamming hat.  I now
realize that this society is too far gone to be saved.
All of you fascist
minivan driving morons are too wrapped up in your
consuming wasteful ways.
I will have a child.  One child that I will groom to be
the next ruler of
the world.  S/he will enslave the proletariat minivan
driving class and
forcibly sterilize them.  I once tried to save you all
from yourselves.
Now that I know how much you cling to your ignorance I
will destroy you.
The first policy is that all male children will have a
valve installed in
their sperm ducts that is only reversible by a doctor.
Anyone found trying
to subvert this order will be punished by having a heavy
metal wheel
similar to that of a steamroller parked on their ankles.
That wheel will
progress at the rate of 1 inch per hour.  To be allowed
to breed one will
have to obtain a parenting license decided by a battery
of physical and
mental testing.  We will purify the human race by an
artificial selection to
make up for the centuries of natural selection going
idle, due to weak and
stupid people sponging off the society built by strong
intelligent people
like me.  Unless some minivan driving, cell phone
yacking, one hand
McDonalds eating, MADD mother kills me first while
holding a cheeseburger in
one hand and a cell phone in the other and driving with
their knees.

ps. are you more afraid of a woman like this with a huge
MADD sticker, or me
plastered in a geo metro?

Get with the times.  The mini-van is not the elitist soccer mom vehicle it once used to
be.  The new vehicle of choice for the elitist, cell-phone-stuck-in-their-ear, suburbanite
is the SUV.  Minivan prices have gone down so much in the past five years that any
blue collar riff-raff can afford to buy and drive one of these common vehicles and the
insurance on them is reasonable.  As for the SUV, there is a vehicle that should be
banned.  This is the vehicle whose drivers think they are driving a two seater sports
car and eventually end up rolling down an embankment and getting their cell phone
permanently embedded in their brain.  The insurance rates on SUVs are a lot higher
because they are so much more dangerous and I am sure that the insurance
companies have taken into account the (poor) quality of driver of these vehicles.
Anyone who bashes minivans simply because they think it is the ultimate
yuppie-mobile needs to take a good look inside all those nice new Dodge Durangos,
GMC Jimmys, Ford Explorers, and Jeep Cherokees that are driven as “city” vehicles.
I’ll bet that you’ll see more cell phones and soccer balls than in all other vehicles
combined.  How many of these SUV driving yuppies would even know when to use
that 4WD (or how to drive a manual transmission, for that matter)?

I haven't read all of the comments on this Web site, but
after reading a
bunch I would think that this web site should be renamed
to "MiniVans
that Rock!".  Those who are anti-minivans obviously are
young and have
not started a family yet.  I stumbled on this site
because I am
searching for a new minivan and would like more
information.

How else can you transport 2 or more screaming kids?  In
a 4 door?
Guess again.  In a 4x4?  Hey I'm not Bill Gates, I have
a budget you
know.

So the question for "the family man" is not whether to
buy a minivan...
but which one to buy?  And for the "youngsters" who just
got their
license... wait about 15 years, you'll see what I mean.

I'm a 16 year old guy and I'm not proud to say I drive a
minivan.  It's the
only available car in my household at my disposal.  I
don't like driving it.
But it's a nice ride.  I am a good driver.  I read all
the stories on your
web page and everybody complains about the drivers of
the minivans.  It's not
the car that switches lanes on a whim.  It's the driver
driving the minivan.
The minivan doesn't drive itself.  The website should
be,
"P.A.M.V.D.W.D.K.H.T.D." or People Agains't Mini-Van
Drivers Who Don't Know
How To Drive.

I have to say I never thought it would come down to it, but I will probably buy a mini van. I only have 2
kids, and in my late 20s. I am the muscle car type and I own 2 classics, which will go to my kids
some day.  So, in order to save the wear and tear on the REAL cars, this is my resort. Ever tried to
put a large box in an average car? I'm not a PTA member, an avid parking space thief, or a "road
jerk."  I figure I will tint the front side windows the darkest I legally can so people can't see me that
well, at least its better than a station wagon! Bottom line is like most mini van owners, I need the
extra space, not a fashion statement. Maybe in the end, I'll assemble a Demolition Derby for mini
vans and all those who swore they'd never buy one, can bring theirs! Crystal

Gees

Get a life, i'v had a minivan for 10 years and it's the
best thing sense sex.

Try it you may like it. (a minivan or sex)

PS if you were getting any you wouldn't have a burr up
your back side.

Charlie

What a bunch of idiots you all are. It's not the minivans that are driving poorly---it's the people driving. The same
person who is fussing with their baby while driving a minivan and not paying attention would do the same thing in a
Sebring, an Intrepid, a Blazer----whatever car they happened to be in that day. You can say you hate minivans because
you can't see around them: that's legitimate, but then you also have to say you hate SUVs for the same reason---you
certainly can't see around them, either! You should be saying you hate bad drivers---not minivans!

Does anyone know where I can get a good deal on a mini van with cup
holders, dual air, CD player, auto blinkers and built in mapsco?

I unfortunately own a Mini van for the sake of practicality, or should I
say my wife owns a Mini van. We purchased our Mini van brand new a year
ago because my wife's family were visiting and with 2 kids and 5 adult,
my wife decided that we purchase one.

I have always dislike mini van because I drive a Honda Prelude and a BMW
convertible and hence I have witnessed a lot of dangerous mini van
drivers. I hate driving this vehicle and we've had nothing but
mechanical problems with the Dodge Grand Caravan. Now my wife hates
driving the Damn thing and I have to give up my BMW since her family are
back in England. I cannot sell the damn thing as I will end up losing a
lot of money and it's become an expensive useless driveway ornament.

My advice to fellow mini van haters out there, make sure that your
families and friends do not purchase these van and together we can drive
down the sale of these vehicles and save humanity and get our roads
back. Just a venting mini van owner.

Eddie

My Caravan is the best vehicle I have owned out of 30 or so makes and models. I'm here to to tell you to get a life and judge
drivers, if you must, the vehicle is only the messenger.

O.K., O.K....I can see why some people "hate" mini vans (before anyone
reads
further, for the record, I don't drive one myself, but read on):  It's
not
much fun to get stuck behind one because they block your view;  They do
have
a propensity to be driven by moms with kids and who knows what else
inside;
Their drivers are not usually the best drivers and they do sometimes
drive
dangerously or at least spaced out.

I, personally, like the higher seating position, versatility to carry
things,
etc.  We bought a 1995 Voyager, and except for the fact that all Chrysler
products tend to eat tires and generate flat places on tires because of
poor
front wheel drive engineering, it was a fun vehicle to drive.  But, being
the
original design, it was top-heavy, and my wife flipped it after going
slightly off the road momentarily and trying to correct this, it did a
180,
hit a light pole, and flipped, landing on the driver side.  She was only
slightly injured, mostly bruised and one or two cuts from broken glass,
but
it was amazing that she wasn't hurt much worse.  The moral of this story
is,
they are more dangerous than a car is because they are taller and their
center of gravity is higher.  Other safety issues surfaced such as the
rear
lift-gate flying open during rear collisions - I'm sure there are a few
others.  But...they sure were popular for a reason, and look at todays
popularity of sport utes.  They're even bigger, eat more gas, and really
overdo things such as --- who needs 4-wheel drive?  Are they safer?
Heck,
no, because their center of gravity is very high, also.

I agree                                                                                                                             Fri, 28 Jul 2000

This is in response to the person who wrote in and said they were
against people against mini-vans pro-creating.  I agree whole
heartedly.  When I first saw this site, I was disgusted by the comments
made about children.  It doesn't seem to me like these people are just
against mini-vans, they are also against children.  There must be some
reason why you are so disgusted by children in general.  I will not even
speculate as to why.  Let me clarify by saying, I am the "significant
other" of the resident "jar-head" as you all so fondly call him.  We
have 7 kids, yes all ours.  Six I have given birth to.  I am not making
these comments because I have a half dozen kids, simply as a concerned
adult.  I am afraid for your kids if you are ever stupid enough to
forget the birth control I HOPE you are using.  I suspect that those
children that I see every day at my job.  (At an elementary school) that
are hungry for attention, that have NO social skills, that think the
world OWES them everything, that do not have a clue what right and wrong
are, are products of parents just like you.  Parents who screwed up,
forgot the birth control and now resent the little heathens for
interrupting your happy life.  Do the world a favor and get yourselfs
sterilized before you bring another child into this world to suffer.
On to the subject at hand.  Yes we own a mini van.  I HATE it, I detest
it.  *I* never wanted it.  You see, my ex-husband, the father of 5 of
the children, insisted we buy it, then 3 months later walked out on us
and left me to pay for it, that is the ONLY reason I have it.  Yes it
helps to get the children and the stuff from point a to point b, but, if
I had a choice, I would be just as happy to take two other vehicles to
get there.  I only drive it when necessary.  If I had a choice, I would
much rather drive any other vehicle out there.  So, NO its not always a
womans choice to buy the thing.  My ex now carts himself around town,
and our 5 children when he has them, in a Honda accord, which doesn't
have sufficient seat belts for them or room.  He left me with the
hideous mini-van and an enormous payment that goes with.  No they are
not cheap.  I don't even have the top of the line model and my payment
could easily get me any other car out there.  I have been left with NO
choice but to drive it.  In slight defense of the mini-van however, IT
IS NOT THE CAR, BUT THE DRIVER.  Any vehicle out there is a death trap
in the hands of morons who don't know how to drive.  Not just the
minivans, but I agree, also that there is more than your fair share of
mini-van drivers who don't have a clue. I don't blame the vehicle, I
blame the driver.  Thanks for letting me vent and haha to all of you,
this is hurmorous reading.

I am going to have to disagree with all the minivan haters...  It is
totally prejudice...  You are all prejudging people.  For what reason?
Maybe you think you are a perfect driver and you don't think that anyone
else should be on your road??  Once upon a time this country was a
friendly place to live where people cared about each other.  People had
patience...  Some of the people that seem to aggrivate you are more than
likely not going to die from a heart attack due to an extreme case of
road rage.  Chill out.  If you read all of the comments you will here
what some people have to say on the other side of the story and if you
can't listen to that side than you have a serious problem.  I have had
more small cars, sports cars, suv's, cadillacs and lincolns(usually
driven by old people) get me frustrated.  I don't seem to run into that
many maniac drivers in the seat of a minivan... At least not as many as
you do.  I see lots of crazy drivers.. I live in Massachusetts and I do a
lot of traveling...  I see a lot of maniacs...  and I can not honestly
say that minivans are the root of all evil...  I can understand some of
your generalizations...  but it is no reason to judge people and
definitely no reason to get that upset as to want to castrate them and
want to get rid of them.  Minivans are a life saver to a lot of people...
 Check the stats and see if they are as bad as you all dicide that they
are.  and again...  There is only one thing in life that you can
control...  that is you.  Your behavior, frustrations and bad
attitudes... they don't come from a minivan... they come from you...
So...  take a little responsibility for your own attitudes and
problems...

My comment is directed towards the statement made on
Wednesday the 24, in May of 2000. I drive a bronco II
which is the smaller of the Ford Bronco SUV's, and I
beleive that you should pull your head out from
between your legs and get a clue. Sure SUV's may be
more dangerous, but as long as you know how to drive
one you are just as safe (with any bit of common sense
you should know that they are top heavy). I don't live
very close to town, and road commision trucks don't
clear snow off my road for days after it snows, so a 4
wheel drive is essential for me. I have also driven it
through over two and a half feet of water with no
complications, I'de like to see whatever you drive go
through that. I also have a half hour drive to work
each day, so the smaller suv saves greatly on gas
milage. I guess you can say that I am a truck man and
wouldn't choose to get a car for the life of me, but
when I needed the passanger, and no longer had the
need for the truck bed, an SUV was Ideal for me. If
you still feel that SUV's are that bad, then you
obviously haven't removed your head from between your
legs. Oh, and yes it is a manual transmission.

I just wanted to let everyone out there that think
mini-vans are slow that I tweeked my Kick as MINI-VAN,
and has been proven to kick most any sports car away.
I have a Ford Winstar with a few extras. I squeezed in
a 454 big block, with racing headers, dual overhead
cams, chrome tipped straight pipes that have cherry
bombs on them. I lowered the van to 2" off the ground,
and put a turbo 400 tranny with shift kit, hooked to a
B&M shifter, oh and I borred the eng. 40 over.. Lets
just say I have no problem with get up and go. the
front end does start to lift up at about 176 mph, but
is still controlable at 193 mph. If you want to race
me with your turd of a vehicle email me at

So many times I sit in our car to wait for my wife to shop, so I park out
of the way to get a bit of fresh air with windows down. THEN before I get
a chance to get a breeze or fresh air a van pulls up along side of me
blocking the breeze and quite often another van will pull up on the
other side blocking my view.

OK, I'M a breeder...I have a kid...but I DON'T drive a
minivan!!!
That's what station wagons are for! And they are cool,
except no one makes the really cool full size ones
anymore.

I understand some people NEED minivans (Disabled people, delivery drivers,etc.), but most people buy them
for all the wrong reasons and think they're invincible
in them.

The other day I took my little sister to eat at some Italian place.  As we were pulling out to leave, this psycho soccer mom comes flying out in front of us.  We waited to
get a left turn for a while and as soon as it was clear, she started to roll off.  Of course since this is a Mini-van story, she screwed it up.  She cut the corner too hard and
got the front and back wheels on either side of a corner in the median.  Instead of backing up and retrying her move, she floored it, causing the back wheels to go up.

At the same time, her front wheels slipped and the back ones didn't make the jump, so she high centered her stupid mini-van on the median.

p.s-  I used to have a mini-van and it was okay, but the windows and sliding doors broke about every 1000 miles.

You people must have far too much time on your hands to have devoted a web
site to criticizing mini vans.

Although I admit they are not the most attractive, they sure are functional.
What's wrong with that?

I guess the majority of the people who enter this site have two door Miata's,
a second winter car and a bus to actually transport more than a gym bag.

I loathe the whole wholesome "soccer mom" image that associates with those nerdy, ugly, unattractive family movers. Dad's out there...GET A GRIP ON YOURSELVES!!!
(slap slap!!) You can still cart around your brats in a killer (extended cab) pickup and still look cool going to the mall. (or wherever you breeders go to these days) Take
those uncool, gutless, no power whatsoever mini-tanks and trade them in so some other pathetic family can get suckered in.

I recently moved to Japan and let me tell you.....you think you have it bad in suburbia..come to Japan!
Everyone here drives as though they are in a minivan and then there are the mini minivans;
the evil spawn of its full sized progenitor.  These compact car sized vans are popular with teens, moms, everyone here who can get their hands on one.
They dart in and out of traffic even more quickly and dangerously and of course keeping with tradition,
not a turn signal in sight.
Nighttime driving is a hazard in itself, but add the often blinding light projecting from one of the many 'clubs on wheels' and you might be wise to just  stay in after dark.
 The younger Japanese deck their vans out with disco balls, blacklights, strobelights and even the very popular after market flashing skull drink holder.

No Subject                                                                                                                      Thu, 7 Dec 2000

hey all you minivan lovin jerks-your cars are so great, aren't they?  then how come my 91 Bronco will haul 3 kids, 2 dogs, gear for a
week, a 5000 pound trailer and a canoe on the roof.  how un-American is that, you jerks?  by the way, the bronco will go anywhere
and everywhere (just go ahead and take your minivan off road),  beat your minivan any day of the week in a race, tow more, and i have
155,000 miles on it and it still runs great and looks twice as good as your minivan!  oh by the way if you think the five star crash test
makes you invincible,  run into the bronco and see what happens.  by the way for you SUV-haters i actually do take this vehicle
off road and have 33 in mud terrain tires on it, and i have manual locking hubs and manual 4 wheel shift because i use the truck for all
and every intended purposes (there are a lot of useful things)

Every now and again I run across a webpage that begs a response and this, unfortunately is one.  I'm no fan of mini-vans myself;
there isn't much worse than being stuck in formation with a crowd of Yuppies with Puppies toddling along in both lanes at the speed
of molasses.  They have been documented hazardous in the past.  They are stunningly ugly.  They are all-pervasive, and I agree, it is
amusing to watch a couple with one child in a rocket seat climb into one of these Conestoga wagons.

That said, I also know from personal experience that they are incredibly practical.  If driven responsibly, they are no more irritating
than the blonde X-er cow in the Sunfire who spends more time worrying about the state of her makeup and whether or not she is
smoking in a manner which will let the boys know she's no slouch at sucking or blowing.  Am I bitter?  Not particularly.  I do believe
that idiocy knows no boundaries.  It's my personal view that it particularly affects that group of people born between 1965 and 1981,
but that's just me.  All things considered, I would prefer to be my middle-aged self than a pouty and disaffected punk-ass brat for
whom nothing is good enough.

I'm generalizing, but since this page is based on generalizations, it should fit right in.

To particulars, now.

The page certainly has merit, but it might be funnier if it offered something other than rants.  Essentially, you're allowing others to do
your work.  Where I come from, this is called 'laziness'.  Get a dictionary.  Look it up.  Write your own bits, invite participation of a
sort other than 'they suck!'  'Rock on, man!'

Perhaps you might tone down the submissions from 'non-breeders' who seem to have nothing but contempt for those of us who have
attempted to provide them with some kind of retirement income.  Child-bearing is a personal decision, and it's a decision that should
be made by an adult as opposed to a whiny little shit who's decided it is all about her but hasn't discovered that the rest of the world
could give a flying fuck. It's nice to see that there are a few whiny little shits who have opted out of the gene-pool by choice.  My own
blood pressure goes up every time I have to trail some late model piece of shit with a license plate bracket that says 'Hail to the
Princess' or 'Zero to Bitch in 2.0 Seconds'.  Impressive, really impressive, especially when a good percentage of you go home and
ask Daddy to fill the gas tank and the rest of you work three jobs because those damn Tommy Hilfiger jeans are so expensive.

Back off on the mini-van drivers until you have an opinion.  They live in their own private hell

Oh, do I need to submit this, or 'summit' it.  Is that a new term invented by over-educated and under-motivated whiners, or is this just
more of that darned laziness?

you need to clarify on your page about what mini-vans you are talking about.

I own an 90 astro, and it ain't for haulin kids!

http://www.vannin.com/area51

Dave "ASTRO" Hufstader
Webmaster, WWW.Vannin.Com
 Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and a dark side, and
 it holds the universe together ...
 -- Carl Zwanzig

You think minivan drivers are bad!  Those ugly stinking suv's are a pain
in the ass on the road.  Women drivers are the hazards on the road and I
have driven and looked at all the suv's and they are the ugly boxey,
rought, air noise and road noise are extreme.  You take all the suv's
you want ....I will take my ugly van with comfort....

You need Help lol                                                                                                          Fri, 26 Jan 2001

For one who are you to judge people I didnt know you was GOD and for two
what says that only minivan drivers are the slow pokes lol i've seen
people in very exspensive cars and not so exspensive and very old cars
and news cars that ALL have their driving faults and it isnt the MINIVAN
that makes this happen lol Geez you guys must be from kiddieland to be
judging one another like this just from the Vehicle they drive! GOD says
not to judge so guess you all think its cool or something to down
someone from the vehicle they drive so how about GROW UP lol  I do not
own a minivan but I would never try and say that minivans are the
problems here lol try looking in the MIRROR people like YOU are the
problem that think they are above everyone and dont do any of what your
complaining about what others are doing.

PAMV                                                                                                                              Tue, 6 Feb 2001

WHY DO MINI-VANS ALWAYS THINK THAT BY FUDGING AS MUCH AS A CAR LENGTH, THAT  THAT UNDER POWERED BEAST
WILL STAY AHEAD OF MY ACURA?

Fucking Crappy Ass Square Lunch Boxes!!!! AKA the MiniVan                               Sat, 17 Feb 2001

I hate those fucking people who own mini-vans!  They should all drive their boxed wonders into a demolition derby and kill each
other!  One day I was driving behind a boxed wonder and the mother fucker was doing 40 mph in the passing lane, BTW 65 mph
speed limit... eating a shit load of Mc Donald's breakfast and talking on a cell phone.  Naturally I pass and the driver flashes his lights
at me.   Now I am really ticked off so I slow down drastically.  And give the guy the finger.  He really is lucky I did not shoot him
because I was really in a bad mood....

my mini van                                                                                                                   Sun, 18 Feb 2001

I to own a mini van an 1997 Dodge Grand Caravan  previous  an 1988 Camaro
(305 suped injected NOS and gadgets) before that an 1982 Chevy S10 (305
nothing mild) and a bunch of imports. my mini is drop 2-0 i have an 5.9
magnum from a 97 PU the transmission five speed standard converted to rear
wheel  it faster then any stock Chevy ford or there so i raced plenty of ss
camaro's  roush mustang and prelude  civic or what evers  i run a 200o LB
stereo system for work  o run at new jersey english town  raceway in Houston
and it grate way to make fun of people in sports car who cant keep up with my
minivan

What the....                                                                                                                  Mon, 19 Feb 2001

....hell do you drive then freak? Probaby a Hyundai Pony or something similar kind of shitter. Minivans are based on the offical car of
the century I'll have you know and anybody will tell you there's more than enough room in the back to hump a bird you've picked up
on your nice set of wheels doggy style in the back. That might make you think different....?

forgive me for raving                                                                                                     Tue, 20 Feb 2001

I know everyone who drives faster than you is an idiot and everyone who
drives slower than you is a jerk, but why does every mini van owner drive
like a jerk and an idiot?  I have yet to find a person who owns a mini van
to be obeying the traffic laws or the laws of commons sense.  They have a
car full of kids and drive so slow I want to come up behind them and nudge
them or they are cutting across 3 lanes of traffic to get to an exit or (my
favorite) racing to get the soccer field.  Or my personal pet peeve.. they
have a car full of kids, coffee in one hand and their cell phone in the
other.  Blah, Blah Blah.. not looking where they are going.  No joke I have
seen it.  Who the heck is driving?  The snot nosed brat in the passengers
seat going to hockey practice?  Help me please to understand.  They drive
me nuts when the are on the road with me.  They should be banned or
licensed.  The license should read.  "The operator has permission to drive
like a jerk and idiot and endanger others at all cost".  "Any erratic
driving is fine, as long as you don't spill your drink".

Hey I finally got rid of my mini-van for a Ford Taurus Wagon and what an
improvement it actually corners and is drivable. And as for my reference
to reality I have owned several motorbikes most recently a 1000cc Suzuki
and a minivan operator actually tried to race me at a stop light .

I drive a Ford F150, and it's getting old.  I've got a family of 4 and
I'm a gigging musician with equipment that's always being moved.
Need the room man!  I've been looking at mini-vans on the web.  Then
I found this web site.  Now I'm so confused.  I was lead to believe that
mini-vans are for the people, but now I know that mini-vans are from
the devil.  Some further research offered more proof.  All mini-vans are
available in red.  RED!,   That's the devils color.  Maybe I'll rethink my
new vehicle strategy....Thanks P.A.M.V.!  You're service, honesty, and
unbiased (real world) testimonials are an inspiration to us all.

As a mechanic of about twenty years, I can truly say mini-   vans suck!!! You ever watched a mechanic walk away from a ford,
(arrowstar or windstar) When they  go wash their hands its not because their dirty, Its to wash the blood off their hands. They should be
called  shredder systems, or skin donators. Who ever  came up with the blueprint, Surly came from hell... I could talk about dodge
but i wont,YET

Minivan DRIVERS                                                                                                        Thu, 7 Feb 2002

Alas, I too have now joined the mini-van ranks. It really hurts to spend money on something you don't want, but at least I
bought used.
 
There should be an SUV driver subsection here, because they are at least as bad as mini-van drivers. Oh well, at least they may
roll over and die faster, thus thinning the population.
 
Great Site!

I hate these people                                                                                                          Sat, 23 Feb 2002

This is what really pisses me off. Mini van drivers are generally soccor mom's or dad's who think their mission, whatever it may be, is
always more important than other drivers on the road. I witness this everyday, driving to and from work, as I see these people trying
to cut into traffic on the right hand shoulder, or running through red lights, or darting through lanes cutting other people off. Mini vans
have their purpose; there are people who need wheel chair access, delivery vehicles, etc. But, I have no respect for the mini van
driving mom or dad, who should by the way not drive during rush hour when other tax paying citizens are trying to go to work. If they
would just pull their head out of their Asses and realize there are other people on the road and show some courtesy we wouldn't hate
them. However, I have to believe these people have no common sense therefore they will always be around UNFORTUNATELY.

no subject                                                                                                                       Sat, 23 Feb 2002

I have to laugh at the junior in high school who said that he drives a mini van and has the "coolest car" in school.  Sure you do
you little dweeb.  I bet all the girls want to ride with you....... In your dreams you little pud.  I can bet that it mommy and daddy
(if you have a daddy) bought you a sports car you wouldn't cherrish you piece of crap mini van.  By-the-way, what the hell is a
high school student doing driving a mini van?  At least go out and by an economy car.

PDNPMEM

no subject                                                                                                                        Sat, 23 Feb 2002

I love these mini van drivers who try to justify driving these pieces of garbage.  Especially the woman who said that she has a
1978 model with 375,000 miles on it.  Who in the hell would want to keep a car that long?  Get rid of the piece of shit.  Get a
life.  These people are ass holes.

My Minivan Story                                                                                                         Wed, 27 Feb 2002

I too am a minivan driver. Yet, mine was given to me by my parents. I really don't mind them.
You're a bit high off the ground, yet not cugging down gass like a college student does beer. In
fact, I AM a college student living at home and commuting.

Yes, I am guilty of parking crooked in a parking lot. But nothing beats slamming the throttle
and peeling out of a parking lot with that thing.

I do use it. Due to the fact that my mom works oin a few plays each year, it's invaluable for
hauling setpices and props. PLUS it's been the most reliable car i've had. over 160,000 miles
and only five major repairs. Did I mention this is a '91 Oldsmobile Shilouette?

 (no subject)                                                                                                                  Thu, 14 Mar 2002

Minivans, the perfect vehicle for the exquisitely tasteless, who dine at
McDonalds, shop at WalMart, watch WWF and Survivor on TV, drive to the
beach once a year and lay their pale bodies on the beach and rub
sunblock all over their kids all day. Also works well for the "stay at
home" mom whose sole purpose in life is to squeeze out as many pups as
possible, walk around in her soccer mom uniform (perfectly sterile,
neatly tied tennis shoes, little white and pink socks and khaki shorts,
and walk around the mall with baby strollers smacking into my ankles
because they're too busy leafing through their coupons, talking to their
bubble brained buddies on their cells, and changing diapers which they
toss into the parking lot.

a proud minivan owner                                                                                                Thu, 21 Mar 2002

I drive a minivan and im proud.  Im also a great driver.  more often than not im bieng cut off by some idiot in an suv or a station
wagon.  All of you who bought some huge gas guzzler with four wheel drive that you use once a year if at all are the ones who should
be ashamed.  My minivan has a DVD player, a playstation2 and 3 hi definition screens, 4 12 inch subs, 6 6 x 9's and a whole lotta
amps., 2 swivling captians chairs in the middle, a fridge and a wet bar, not to mention a couple of nice mods to the motor.  I get way
better gas milage (i chose to help save the environment, not destroy it) my friends and I can ride around in comfort and style, while all
of you bicker and moan about what kind of car other people drive.  as if thats some indication of what kind of driver you
are...please..........

 doll car                                                                                                                           Sat, 06 Apr 2002

i bet you were the idiot in the yugo that pulled out in front of
me....just keep worshipping the rice burning doll car.....your gonna get
real far with your attitude, and furthermore, YOU SUCK

Refuse to Buy Another Mini-Van                                                                                Mon, 15 Apr 2002

Refuse to Buy Another Mini Van
 
I have a 1993 Mercury Villager and am in the market for a new vehicle.  The van is running fine for now but with
140,000 miles on it; who knows how much longer we have with it and I don't want to put any more money into a
vehicle that I'm honestly sick of driving.
 
I am desparate for something different.  There is no way I will buy another mini-van... not because the one we
have gave us ton of mechanical problems... it's just...  it's just.... it's a MINI-VAN...  I'm in my early 30's with 3
children all under age 8....  my youth is being sucked away by these type of vehicles.
Wish us luck... we're looking into the SUV market...   looked at a Chevy Trailblazer EXT... honestly, did not send
me ...    however, I'm very interested in the Chevy Avalanche because it's styling is so out there... but with 3
kids... am I crazy?
 
No offense to any current mini-van owners; like I said mine is running very well; but I am so bored with these type
of cars.... somebody help!!!  :-)

 Wonderful website                                                                                                      Mon, 29 Apr 2002

I have been telling my girlfriend for months about my hatred for minivans.
She thought I was crazy but everytime we got cut off or traffic was at a
halt, there was a minivan to blame. Cel phone yappers, soccer moms, foreigners,
elderly and just plain stupid people. My own mother has a minivan so I know
for a fact that she should not be behind the wheel.
   There's a song at www.mp3.com/clintpresley called "SOMEBODY'S GETTIN
SLAPPED TONIGHT" that mentions traffic situations inspired by the overweight
golf cart.

Thanks for putting the site up. Now I know I'm not crazy. David, Atlanta,GA

Not just mini-vans...                                                                                                    Mon, 29 Apr 2002

Heh...  Came across this when seeing if anything came up under a topic which
I have on one of my web pages: People Against Dumb Drivers.  Minivans are on
my list of annoying vehicles, but seriously - the top 4 are these:

1. White Vans - Doesn't matter what the make, model, type (including mini)
is.  If it's a white van, the driver is likely to be incoherent and unaware
that he/she is supposed to be driving.  Typical behavior - camping in the
left lane and matching speed with right lane.  Also may make lane changes or
wander between lanes.

2. Crown Victorias - Plain reason is this: Driving while dead.  The typical
Crown Vic driver (excluding law enforcement and some taxis) is older than
the country they're living in.  If you're old enough to be under the dirt,
you shouldn't be on the road.  Typical behavior - going 20 MPH under the
speed limit, even if the posted MPH is 25.

3. Red Trucks - Similar in manner to the white van driver.  But more likely
to be a "Bubba".  'Nuff said.

4.  Semis - Mainly because the drivers don't care if they decide to drive
slow and their "f*** you" attitude.  They're big, you're small, and if they
want to block the fast lane (dammit!) - they're going to.  Typical behavior:
Blocking merging/exiting traffic, waiting for approaching and faster moving
car (which should pass) and executing blocking manuever, using more than one
lane.

no subject                                                                                                                       Mon, 6 May 2002

This is the most ridiculous collections of letters I have ever seen.   Get life!   Be concerned about something that matters.   No, I
don't own a Minivan, but i might get one just bug you people.

Need help in wiping up mini-van use                                                                         Mon, 13 May 2002

Not only do I hate these modern marvels of transportation to begin with, but I have to do a report on reasearching three types of
mini-vans that will become the new company vehicle.  After looking at your site for the last 45 minutes I loathe these machines even
more than I could ever imagine...so can someone suggest which mini-van's are the worst? I want the company to feel it's own wrath!

*note from the web master:
All comments are posted exactly as they are received. Seems to me that some of you mini van lovers are proving my point!