They probably mistakenly assume the anchors are talking that urgently about something of historical importance: perhaps another war broke out, a new continent was discovered, or Britney Spears is driving again. But then on the screen appears footage from Nebraska of a border collie with its head stuck in a box or something just as silly. The telecast cuts back to the anchors and they’re no longer sounding urgent, but laughing. Laughing! But only briefly, before they shift back to Urgent Anchor mode again as one of them reads a Breaking News Story about a parrot in Seattle that can tell time.

That’s how urgent the news about Blu-ray DVDs came across the other week. The anchor explained in an urgent-sounding voice how the Blu-ray system had won out over HD DVDs for the high-definition market. My first thought was: “This might be even bigger news than a time-telling parrot.” My second thought was, “Great, does this mean my old DVD player is obsolete now?”

About once every six months I rant anew about the ever-quickening pace of technological advancements. That’s because in the past when technological advancements took place it was mostly outside the home. Hospitals got more high tech equipment, airplanes were improved, etc. But it seems now we must replace our own stuff with new stuff and do it before our old stuff breaks, stops working, or we lose it somewhere.

Everything I own might be obsolete now. It still works, but something better is on the market. For example, my computer doesn’t have Vista, my children’s gaming system is not a Wii (or even a Waa or a Woo for that matter), my television is analogue, my toaster isn’t also an MP3 player with Internet connectivity. Basically, what I own is junk. It’s all so 2002-2003 era. I might as well be living in an antique store. Where’s my ascot?

Here’s what I mean about my stuff. The same week I heard about the Blu-ray victory, a news anchor was also urgently telling viewers that some older analogue cell phones would no longer work come midnight that day. This is similar to the digital conversion for TVs next year and which threatens to turn our old television sets into extremely large paperweights. After hearing the report, I actually wondered if my cell phone - which doesn’t even take pictures, that’s how old it is - would stop working the next morning.

Luckily, I am not so far behind the curve as I feared. The phone apparently is digital. At any rate, it continues to function. It turns out the analogue phones were those bulkier, first generation cell phones from way back in the 1980s and 1990s and which were so large kids today might easily mistaken one for a microwave oven.

As for the Blu-ray dominance over HD DVDs we knew this was coming. There have been urgent news stories for years about the smack down fight between the two high-def systems. This harkens back to the early home video days in the 1980s and the old wars between Betamax and VHS videocassettes.

Kids, you might never have heard about the Beta Wars – or even videocassettes - but the fighting tore this country apart. Beta owners were fierce and loyal, and to this day many still believe their product was superior. Similar to how old Japanese soldiers were found years later on deserted Pacific islands still fighting World War II, there is probably some Beta diehard still watching a Beta tape version of “Against All Odds,” convinced Beta will make a comeback someday.

Anyway, we are experiencing something similar. The Blu-ray system seems to have won. Eventually, I’ll probably upgrade my TV and DVD player to high-def. Maybe I’ll even do it before Blu-ray becomes obsolete. Or I’ll just wait another six months for the next new thing to come out.

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